Your mom woke me at 6 am this morning to feed you, which was a delight after it being your first night at home.
I’ve been thinking a lot about you - even before you were born, and wanted to let you know what was on my mind and in my heart.
Before you arrived, I had the deepest fears about being a dad. I knew that I was having a son, but the idea of being someone’s daddy was overwhelming at best. As soon as your mom went into labour, all of my worries evaporated away and left a new sense of purpose in my life that I would never know without you.
You will always be my son and I will always be your dad no matter what.
I’ve never loved someone as completely as I do you. You are the reason I get up in the morning, the reason why I stay up late at night(thanks again :D) and you fill up my life in all the ways that it was lacking before. I can’t imagine my life without you in it and I don’t know how I’ve ever survived so long without you. You are the scariest thing that I have ever done, the greatest gift that your mother could have ever given me and you are the most spectacular thing that I will ever help to create. You are my strength in this world and I only have to look at you to push past any obstacles. I will always love you unconditionally with every moment in this world and the next, and I will do anything to protect you and help you in this life. You will find that it can be a struggle to be a good man in this world and to know what’s right and what’s not, but you give me all the strength I need to be a good daddy for you.
In just a few days, I am surprised on the amount of things that I have learned from you and I thought that before I finished this letter that I would point out a few. When you sneeze, you sneeze twice – no more, no less – always twice. There is a special kind of dance that only I know how to get you to do that helps you burp when you’re gassy. When you’re hungry, you smack your lips; when you’re still hungry, you munch on your right fist(actually you do this constantly). You like to kick when your diaper is being changed, and I seem to be the only one who changes them - mommy ‘assists’, because for some reason(that still boggles logic)I prefer to hog this responsibility. The first daddy superpower that I learned was the ability to stop a stream of pee using only my bare hands. You gurgle in what I like to think are ‘bird calls’. I swear that since you were born you have said,”Hi.” on at least 5 different occasions – one of which your mother heard too. You never cry in my arms and I like to boast to everyone about that. You have monkey toes and I wonder if you will be a runner like your dad or perhaps choose to climb instead(seriously, your big toe articulates like a thumb dude – so cool). When you’re quiet and you hear my voice, you look for me until you find me, turning your head in some moments(which is a feat in itself for a 4 day old). I’m always looking for you.
I just can’t wait to see what I learn next son,
Love You, Dad